Monthly Archives: March 2011
I miss the place where the real me can exist with condemnation.Without the stares, the finger pointing and the out right rude comments to my face. No I won’t grow up, no I did not get dressed in the dark.No I am not a want to be Emo,,I am a GOTH.From the age of 11 or so I knew what I wanted to be like.I was sent to a strict Catholic Girls High School and the torture began.In the early years I smoked enough pot to not comprehend other people’s shit or I would drink before school.My liver was fucked by 14. I had ulceration of my stomach lining and spent a lot of time throwing up blood. Any way back to home,,The Hunter Valley, the vines the beaches and the common man.No wankery no class issues, just people getting along with their lives and surviving.Skegs, Goths, Westies, Punks, Metal Heads we all get along.I miss a real custard tart, smut man misses his vanilla slices from the bakery in Newie.God I miss the Rock Shop.
Lately it has come to my attention that there is a lot of fuckwits breathing precious oxygen. I am rapidly becoming very cynical. Yesterday for example, I had collected the kids from school and whilst walking up the road I came across a group of people gathered around a woman sitting on the ground. I stopped as I am an ex RN. The woman was hysterical…why you ask.Well she had left her toddler in a locked car for 40 fucking minutes.She had FORGOT he was there. I am sorry but who forget their child in all seriousness. I gave the kid a once over, told her to get him to the hospital to have him properly hydrated..Well here was her response..”but the department of families will get notified” Yeh love I know it’s called procedure…I was fuming. My kids stood with me as I tried to explain the severity of his dehydrated state. The poor kid was limp and his eyes where glazed over.FOR FUCKS SAKE TAKE HIM NOW. I had no mobile on me and she is bloody lucky I didn’t. I would of called an ambulance.In the end I walked home, utterly disgusted in her attitude and worried for a child that isn’t even mine. So after all that I was so tired we decided to get chinese..we go to pick it up and the fucking battery dies. Stuck in a car park I text a wonderful friend, she drives a fair way to help us jump start the car..In the time though we are sitting in the car park not one person asks if we are ok..Bonnet up me pacing but hey no biggie just keep walking arseholes.Years ago people did stop, people offered help.These days it’s a mentality of me me me fucking me.Finally home, we get to eat the kids play for a while and poor smut man is still sick.This morning I had to drag my arse out of bed, get the kids ready as they have trial testing for the next 3 days.Yay mother of god I am totally over society these days.SO MY FINAL WORDS FOR TODAY ARE.”PLEASE PEOPLE GROW A BRAIN AND A CONCIENCE.”
OK, so today has been utterly fucked up. I got my new tattoo, that I was supposed to get a month ago.GERMS. Hence I had to wait until I was well again. Job done, time for a razor cut..no biggy but Smut Man disaproves completely.He is a believer in long flowy airy faily hair.Me I am partial to a Mohawke.So after my sojourn to the Salon if you will I headed for the grocery store.I loathe shopping.Detest it even. People in there fart arsing about over fucking eggs and what washing powder to buy.Get out of bloody way.It took me a total of 20 minutes from go to woe.I get pissed off with kids whinging over lollies and wanting shit(not mine) as they are at school. Shopping done and Smut Man picks me up from the store. I am a legally blind goth..so of course black is my choice of clothes..it’s easy to find.I come home I battle it out with the insurance company AGAIN.FUCK FUCK AND FUCK AGAIN. I hate beaurocracy in all it’s forms.I swear it would be easier to punch myself in the head then to listen to their crap. I do the school pick up as Smut Man is ill again. I really cannot tolerate the other parents.White pants wearing WANKERS…………GET OUT OF MY WAY DO NOT LOOK AT ME..Yes I am different but you are god damn UGLY. A mum at the school that I do speak to was asking me wether our kids teacher bats for the other team..I replied yeh but man the chick she would be with must be desperate.She yells she is some kind of overlord of teachers and a fuckwitt to boot.
That’s all I have to say.Seriously. Strange days indeed.
So we have been robbed, I am gutted to say the least.The scum stole my great grandparents chains and religious medallions. These items I was supposed to hand down to my little girl. Now gone and a beautiful tradition broken. The police have been wonderful, caring and understanding of the emotional value they mean to me. The insurance company however are total fucking arseholes.No empathy no nothing zilch. These items stolen are so unique that they are literally one of a kind. It’s not like I can pop on a plane to Rome and pop to The Vatican and buy a replacement.I cried over and over last night. My head pounded my heart raced and my stomach churned.I wanted to scream at someone, at 1am I sat staring at the TV watching the Japanese disaster.For a brief moment I thought to myself that I am lucky to be alive and at least my life is not in ruins, but you know what it fucking is. I despise theives who come into homes and violate your sanctuary, your castle. I want to clean and sterilise my home,I feel dirty and scared.My nerves are frayed I am a mess and I just keep getting sadder as the hours pass.That jewelry was my identity, my culture and my only link left to my family that are all dead.SO WELL DONE FUCKWITT FOR RUINING MY FAITH IN PEOPLE.
Dear life of mine,
Wikipedea is the answer to all your woes. If you are sick then Wikipedea has the answers just ask my skin specialist. Smut man and the boy have come down with a virus.The multitudes of germs around these days leads me to want to live in a big bubble.The girl is a ok.Sadly I am a slack old cheese and slept in this morning as the boy had a shocker last night.So the girl chucked a sickie of her own.Smut man is truly unwell but to his credit managed a fine effort of his favourite sport Bejewelled and got a SUPERNOVA (that’s a special gem for all you unititiated) he relished in his conquest and retreated back to bed with his germs in tow. It’s been a week of hilarity as I have been dubbed a “Troll Slut”. So I am embracing my new monica and trying to get the low down on the inner trollness of mine.You know there a lot of people out there that are wasting precious oxygen yet they are still allowed to breathe, where is the justice, seriously where.Maybe I will find it in Wikipedea…my little troll fingers are going to seek it there.So remember if in doubt just ask the internet, it’s a god,not the god because I am that “GOD” also sometimes the Leader.